Spiritual direction is a one-to-one relationship with another individual for the purpose of obtaining spiritual guidance. “A spiritual director – or soul friend – will encourage, guide, advise, confront and challenge us on the path toward holiness,” writes Father Chet in An Introduction to Spiritual Direction.
It is not a modern concept as Aelred of Rievaulx, an English Cistercian, eloquently described the director-directee relationship in the 12th century:
“What happiness, what security, what joy to have someone to whom you dare to speak on terms of equality as to make another self; one to whom you can unblushingly make known what progress you have made in the spiritual life; one to whom you an entrust all the secrets of your heart and before whom you can place all your plans.”
A session with a spiritual director is having a respectful conversation, in a safe place, with a soul companion.

The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them.
~ Thomas Merton, No Man is an Island
50 Tools for Spiritual Direction
- Spiritual autobiography
- Personal growth plan
- Five hours of prayer, five hours of study per week
- Guidelines for spiritual direction
- Myers–Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI): a tool for self-knowledge
- Four temperaments, different prayer and spirituality for each
- Five methods of prayer using the Bible
- How to use the four functions in prayer and spirituality
- Place of Jungian psychology in spiritual direction
- One hour/day, one day/month, one week/year directed retreat
- Qualities to be developed in a directee
- What to look for in choosing a spiritual director
- What to talk about in spiritual direction sessions
- Six steps in the journey of faith
- How to discover and use the energy of the unconscious shadow
- Seven levels of faith
- Four steps of individuation
- Three Ps: power, pleasure, possessions
- Saint Thérèse of Lisieux’s “little way” of spiritual childhood
- Four gender archetypes
- Recognizing the persona and complexes and using their energy for growth
- Balance between femininity and masculinity (anima/animus)
- Working with archetypes of the collective unconscious
- Centering prayer – how to develop contemplative prayer
- Interpretation of dreams
- Twelve signs of spiritual progress
- Enneagram – a tool for self-knowledge
- Crises of faith
- Discerning God’s will
- Intensive journaling from Ira Progoff
- Personal mission statement
- Guided imagery to heal memories, relationships
- Listening skills
- Pitfalls in spiritual direction
- Differing world views
- Twelve aspects of mission of Christ / Church
- Balanced Christianity
- Law of polarity
- Theological criteria for Christian growth
- Developing an intimate relationship with Jesus
- Different senses of scripture: literal vs. symbolic
- Jesus of history / Christ of revelation
- Love letter to Jesus – daily spiritual journal
- How to handle experiences of the Dark Night of the Soul
- Ministering to alcoholics, addicts, dysfunctional families
- Healing ministry
- How to recognize and develop mystical experiences
- How to handle extraordinary spiritual phenomena
- Ministering to the sick, terminally ill, families of deceased
- Positive attitude toward God, self, others, world, future